New relationship...

I met someone new today. I know, super fast, right? But it's not like that. Clint and I are holding on--we're just not talking to each other right now. He needs space. I hate it, but I get that. When he gets here, we'll work on things. Until then, I'm texting or emailing when necessary, and trying to lay off the rest of the time. It makes me mad, but I know that he needs me to let go right now. So I am. Or I'm trying. We'll see.

So anyway, this person I met? She's a Chief, the Chiefiest Chief on the site. She's pretty much awesome. I was referred to her by the Chaplain that I cried at yesterday. Seriously, I just cried at him. He talked to me for a little bit, but it wasn't especially helpful. I didn't feel that he could empathize with me in anyway. Bless his heart, he tried. And he prayed for us while I was sitting there, which I appreciated.The thing I MOST appreciate? Him sending my information to Chief Murray. She's seriously a delight. She's a strong Christian, but one who has a motley past like me. She alluded to the men in her previous life, and made a point to mention that it was before becoming a Christian. Finally, someone in the AF and in life that I can relate to! She wouldn't let me whine, but showed me the amazing things that I have going for me. AND, she's exactly the right person to make things happen with Clint's separation. I can't tell him, because we aren't talking, but there are at least three people now involved in getting the signatures that need to happen, who are now looking out for the situation. The Colonel has to sign it, but she's here, not in MD. The good thing? My commander is with her! Hopefully we'll be able to get him here sooner rather than later. The most amazing thing is God's hand. He's been involved. We're only here because I couldn't follow, I couldn't believe. I believe now, I'm following, and I'm learning. He's showing me the path, He's introducing me to the people that I need to meet--the ones who will help me on this journey. He gave me Peggee yesterday, when I was trying to figure out how to kill myself, but without it seeming like my fault, so that Clint still got the insurance money. He gave me the chaplain that I didn't want. The one who sent me to Chief. He gave me the Chief that I didn't feel like going to see, who made me feel strong, and made me feel loved.

PRAISE THE LORD! I pray that I do just that all of my days.

**Disclaimer: For those of you who will read this after my previous post, and judge me: Please, judge away! I'm a Christian, not a perfect person. Yes, I swear. I had beer last week. I don't get it all right, but I love God with my whole heart, and I'm working on a good relationship with Him.