What a Christmas

So, my husband? He left me. And the kids. Just like that. Walked out two weeks ago, like a complete fuck. Went back to Maryland. I'm still so mad that I can barely compose complete sentences. What's sad about it? He left me for another woman. She's 30, and ugly, and a lot pathetic. One of the least independent women I've ever seen, which is why her first husband walked out on her, too. Best part? She's military, too. For those of you who are unaware, adultery is ILLEGAL in the military, so she's got a no contact order for my husband. Yeah, my husband who moved back to Maryland for her can't see her, talk to her, email her, whatever. Do you think they're following that? I don't. Sadly, I can't prove it right now. I'll figure out a way though. She could lose her job, get jail time, etc for breaking the no contact order. And for those of you who think that I should be equally as mad at him? I am, no question, but he's the father of my children, and the love of my life, so I'm a little more willing to forgive him than her. Plus, she begged him, FUCKING BEGGED him, to leave his children for Christmas, because she wanted to be with him for the holiday. What kind of a selfish bitch does that? Two little boys, alone at Christmas, because some ugly slut needed my husband?

I don't know what happens next. He wants a divorce. I don't. And I don't want to make it easy for him--after all, does he deserve it? I do know that I have my boys, and I will keep my boys, because I'm the one who will take care of them. I do know that we had a good Christmas, and that I have good friends. I do know that I'll get my degree next semester, and still have my job, and that I'll be just fine. I just need to remember those things. I've got this, right?