I'd call it a building year.

I'm currently pursuing something new. I'm not sure if it'll work out, or if I'll be accepted to the program that lets me get there, but I'm going to give it a shot. If it works, life could get much easier and better. I don't want to be in Texas long term. I like a lot of the people I've met here, but I don't belong here for much longer. God brought me to Texas to bring me back to Him. He brought me here for the family that I needed in my church when my world crumbled around me.
It's crumbled, it's hard, and it's not over. BUT, it's time for me to rebuild. I like me, I love my boys. There's no reason for us to be unhappy. We can build our happiness, and I'm out looking for the ways to make it.

Just you wait, we've got this!

Changes...

So, here we are, 2012. If you'd asked me two months ago, I'd have sworn there was no way I'd start this year alone, but here I am. It's still a shock, and I'm having a hard time processing the idea that he's never coming back. Every now and then, it makes me wonder, because if he can hate me so much now, how did he ever really love me to begin?

I guess I'll figure all that out. One day. In the meantime, I'm doing ok. I'm starting my final semester of college, I've applied for graduation, I'm looking for new places for the boys and I to live, and I'm teaching classes at the Y regularly. The other awesome part is that there is the opportunity to teach other classes soon, and perhaps get on at some other gyms. I'm excited to put my life back together, at least as much as I can, and to take steps forward. It's not what I imagined for me, or my children, and it's still not what I wanted, but I'll get there.

One day at a time...right guys?